How to not enjoy the Dead Sea
You might have never been to the Dead Sea but may have met someone who has told you how awesome it is. Let me tell you, regardless of how much this persons likes you, they lied to you. I’ve been to the Dead Sea and it sucks! Let me explain why.
- Soundtrack of the report
- To The Sea
- Jack Johnson
I had the chance—or the bad luck I should say—to go to the Dead Sea during my trip in Israel in February 2011. I was very excited about it because all my friends told me it was a super awesome thing to do in Israel. I always trust people and follow their advice—that’s an important part of the Hejorama philosophy.
After visiting Jerusalem, we decided to stop at the public beach on our way to Masada. This was the least fun I’ve had in all of my trips. Even standing up for 10 hours in the Cairo-Luxor train was more fun. Here’s why.
The public beach
We decided to go to the public beach and I supported this decision as I always prefer to avoid private beaches and resorts. It was free to go to the water but we rented some towels because we forget ours. But in the end it was a really poor choice as the beach is not technically a beach and more just rocks going into the sea. And exactly when we arrived it was invaded by a group of about 50 screaming kids.
Dead Sea fun facts
- At 417 metres below sea level, the Dead Sea is the lowest point on the Earth's surface.
- It is second saltiest body of water, the first being Lake Asal in Djibouti.
- Dead Sea salt is super bitter and not at all like table salt.
- Centuries ago, one of the popular names of the Dead Sea was “The Stinky Sea”.
- Egyptians used mud from the Dead Sea to in their mummification of the deceased.
Here we are standing in our swimming suits getting ready to have the fun of our life, floating around in the world famous Dead Sea and it gorgeous crystal clear water. Just 5 meters to go... Let me tell you it was 5 meters of pure pain. Why? Because the coast of the sea is made of rocks covered with crisatalized salt that cut your feet once you step on them.
Ok, once we finally got in and I was already in a bad mood because of the rocks. But now the worst part begins. You all know the water is super salty since it’s the actual reason for all the supposed fun of the thing. But the first actual effect is that it’s badly burns any open wound you have on your body, no matter how small it is. And since we totally cut our feet on the salty rocks, it stinged like hell! Depending on the kind of swimming suit you wear it might even burn your genitals pretty bad. If you don’t believe me ask my friend John!
I'd rather fight Clubber Lang than go back to the Dead Sea.
Since you are in the water you need to swim and have some fun right? We haven’t made all this way to get out of the water after 2 minutes. All I can say is no matter what you do, don’t get water on your face. It will burn your eyes so bad that you will be happy to cry and have tears cleaning your eyes from the salt. And honestly it’s pretty hard to not get sprayed when you swim. At least for me...
Do they really look like they are having fun?
Only one option, swim on your back, keep your head well out of the water and if you can wear swimming goggles!
After 5 minutes I was done. I’ve had enough salt in my eyes and it’s not exactly what qualifies as fun for me. I only wanted to get the fuck out of there but there was one last obstacle: those stupid rocks covered with salt. Next time, I’ll bring some shoes to go in the water with... Oh, wait there won’t be a next time for sure.
The coast is super windy so be careful to your stuff. I had to run after our stupid towel ticket when it got blow away by the wind. As if I wasn’t upset enough by the whole water thing...
After I got out I observed the other people to understand why everyone liked it so much. But the reality is no ones enjoys it. Most of the people get in the water for 2 minutes, take silly pictures of themselves floating and then leave. And I swear floating is even not that fun and certainly not worth all the hassle to get in the water. I mean who can’t float in regular water anyways?
OK I admit that I've exaggerated a few things here and although I really didn’t enjoyed, it wasn’t that bad and I’m happy I went so I can report the truth. For some reasons my friends had more fun than me. One advice though, go to a private resort and pay the 50 shekels. The public beach didn’t help...